It is time once again for you to tell me the names of movies that I should cover in “Eric’s Bad Movies” at Film.com. Whenever I think I have run out of good (i.e., bad) options, I issue a request like this and you people come through with films I never would have discovered on my own.
The guidelines are below, along with a list of what I’ve already covered. I’m also posting a list of movies that, while probably suitable for the column, are off the table because they’re not available from Netflix. (I’m not gonna buy an out-of-print DVD from Amazon, or watch something on Hulu, or track down a VHS copy. I’m just not.)
Post your recommendations in the comments, or send me an e-mail or a tweet. As always, thank you for your suggestions! And thank you especially for the suggestions that follow the guidelines!
UPDATE: “The Room” is on my radar. Stop saying “The Room.”
Guidelines for Eric’s Bad Movies
1. It needs to be really bad. Films that are merely mediocre are a waste of time.
2. The film should be considered bad by most people, not just you. I don’t want to have to convince the reader that the movie is bad; I want us to be on the same page from the get-go. I know it’s hard to gauge a consensus sometimes, but use common sense. No matter how much you happen to hate “Titanic” personally, surely you understand that yours is not the prevailing opinion.
3. It needs to have been released theatrically. No straight-to-video or TV movies.
4. Nothing that I wrote a review of when it came out. I probably gave it a nice savaging in my review. To make this easier for you, just assume that everything released since 2000 is off-limits.
5. No comedies. No matter how many times I explain the rationale for this guideline, some of you adorable knuckleheads don’t get it. I love ya! Now shut up and listen. Comedies are very hard to make fun of because they already don’t take themselves seriously. Whether the jokes are funny or not is beside the point. It’s not that it’s impossible to make fun of a bad comedy; it’s that I’m not very good at it. Usually all I can say is, “Boy, this sure isn’t funny!” Comedies that have a supernatural or fantasy twist, like “Teen Witch,” give me a little bit more to work with, so those are OK. But the ideal “Eric’s Bad Movies” candidate is a movie that takes itself quite seriously. Focus on those.
6. I prefer well-known titles over obscure ones. This is the guideline that’s most flexible, since there’s a finite number of famous terrible movies and I’ve already done a lot of them. But it’s more fun when the reader is at least vaguely familiar with the subject, so try to think of those first.
Eric’s Bad Movies so far:
The Adventures of Pluto Nash
Allan Quatermain and the Lost City of Gold
American Ninja
Anaconda
The Apple
The Arrival
The Avengers
Baby Geniuses
Baby: Secret of the Lost Legend
Bangkok Dangerous
Batman & Robin
The Beastmaster
Beautician and the Beast
Bio-Dome
Body Rock
Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo
The Care Bears Movie
Cobra
Cocktail
Congo
Cool World
D-War: Dragon Wars
Death Wish: The Face of Death
The Delta Force
Double Impact
Dracula 2000
Ernest Saves Christmas
Exorcist II: The Heretic
Firewalker
The Forbidden Dance (is Lambada)
Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare
Frogs
Gooby
Garbage Pail Kids
Glitter
The Good Son
Grease 2
Gymkata
Heartbeeps
Hercules (1983)
High School Musical
House II: The Second Story
Howard the Duck
Howling II: Your Sister Is a Werewolf
Hudson Hawk
The Ice Pirates
I Know What You Did Last Summer
Inspector Gadget
The Island of Dr. Moreau
It’s Pat
Jack
Jack Frost (killer snowman)
Jack Frost (family movie)
Jaws 3-D
Jaws: The Revenge
Judge Dredd
Kazaam
King Kong Lives
Kull the Conqueror
Krull
Leprechaun
Leonard Part 6
Mac and Me
The Mangler
The Manitou
Masters of the Universe
Meteor
Mortal Kombat: Annihilation
The Neverending Story III
The Next Karate Kid
Night of the Lepus
976-EVIL
On Deadly Ground
The Other Sister
Orca
Over the Top
The Pagemaster
Patch Adams
Power Rangers: The Movie
Rambo III
Red Sonja
Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band
Shanghai Surprise
Showgirls
Silent Night, Deadly Night
Sleepaway Camp
Sleepwalkers
Speed 2: Cruise Control
Spice World
Star Trek V
Staying Alive
Stone Cold
Street Fighter
Supergirl
Superman III
Superman IV
Super Mario Bros.
Surf Ninjas
Surviving the Game
Tarzan, the Ape Man
Teen Witch
Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation
The 13th Warrior
Timecop
Troll
Two of a Kind
Under Siege 2
Virus
Volcano
Waterworld
The Wiz
The Wizard
Wizards of the Demon Sword
Xanadu
Zardoz
Probably good suggestions that are unavailable, so don’t suggest them:
At the Earth’s Core (1976)
Ator the Fighting Eagle
Can’t Stop the Music
Captain America
Chopping Mall
Cool As Ice
Def-Con 4
Double Dragon
Dungeonmaster
Gleaming the Cube
Happy Birthday to Me
Hercules in New York
Invasion of the Bee Girls
Joysticks
Kingdom of the Spiders
King Solomon’s Mines
Kiss Meets the Phantom of the Park
Land of Doom
Megaforce
The Mod Squad
No Holds Barred
North
Nukie
The Peanut Butter Solution
The Phantom
Prayer of the Rollerboys
The Punisher (1989)
Rad
Rawhead Rex
Remo Williams
Santa with Muscles
Saturn 3
Sextette
Steel
Super Fuzz
Tentacles
Timerider
Yor, Hunter from the Future
