It’s a fiendish dilemma worthy of Jigsaw himself. Next week, “Saw V” and “High School Musical 3” will hit theaters on the same day! How can a person with limited time and money possibly choose which one to see?!
Don’t fret, Hector. We’ve got you covered with this handy chart.
‘Saw V’ vs. ‘High School Musical 3’
Here’s what to see…
If you want to watch death:
“Saw V”
If you want to wish for death:
“High School Musical 3”
If you want to hear young people shrieking:
Either
If you like to watch the process of a song getting stuck in someone’s head:
“High School Musical 3”
If you like to watch the process of a screwdriver getting stuck in someone’s head:
“Saw V”
If the sight of gruesome blood and gore would give you nightmares:
“High School Musical 3”
If the sight of Zac Efron’s waxy, inhuman face would give you nightmares:
“Saw V”
If you’d like to see the film that will eventually be described as “the last movie anyone in the cast ever made before their careers all tanked”:
Either
If you’re stuck babysitting your little sister:
“High School Musical 3”
If you’re stuck babysitting your little sister, and your name is Eli Roth:
“Saw V”
If you enjoy watching people forced to carry out horrible acts by the devious madmen who control their every move:
Either (tell me Jigsaw is any worse than The Walt Disney Company)
If you have trouble following a plot that’s any more complicated than, say, Dumbo:
“High School Musical 3”
If it doesn’t matter to you whether a plot makes sense, as long as it’s accompanied by a loud, grinding heavy-metal soundtrack:
“Saw V”
If you want to see another awful, desperate sequel in a franchise that should have quit after the first one:
Either
— Film.com
