Cinematical Exclusive: Variety’s Layoff Memo

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News item: Showbiz trade publication Variety lays off 30 employees.

Cinematical Exclusive: The memo Variety sent to the affected writers.

BIZ RAG SACKS HACKS

Dear journo:

While your perf as a scribbler has been boffo with execs ever since you preemed as a tyro, auds and crix have nixed you. Variety moguls had a sesh and now agree the conglom lacks the coin to reup your pact. Regrettably, as of tomorrow ayem, you’re ankled.

Sincy,
Variety honchos

— Cinematical

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