“That Awkward Moment” is like an unfunny, R-rated, bro-oriented “Seinfeld,” with three young New York dudes having zany mishaps — “I think the girl I hooked up with is a prostitute!” “I accidentally used skin-bronzer to pleasure myself!” — and trying to convince one another (and themselves) that they remain emotionally unattached to any of the women they sleep with. They have made a deal, you see: graphic-designer studs Jason (Zac Efron) and Daniel (Miles Teller) pledged to remain single in solidarity with their newly divorced doctor friend, Mikey (Michael B. Jordan), and to have only the most casual of sex with the various women in their “rosters.” (“Don’t you have a roster? You gotta have a roster!”) But Jason is falling for new girl Ellie (Imogen Poots), Daniel has commenced a non-platonic relationship with previously platonic friend Chelsea (Mackenzie Davis), and Mikey is secretly hooking up with his ex-wife (Jessica Lucas). Yada yada, sponge-worthy, Soup Nazi, etc.
First-time writer-director Tom Gormican makes a lot of rookie mistakes, like filling his screenplay with despicable characters and making them say and do stupid things. Ellie invites Jason to a “dress-up party,” meaning formal attire, but he takes it to mean “costume party,” and he shows up with a dildo hanging out of his pants, because that’s the sort of costume you wear to a party where you only know one person.
Later, Jason doesn’t go to Ellie’s father’s funeral because he doesn’t want Ellie to think she’s his girlfriend. (Also, the funeral is on Thanksgiving, which the movie doesn’t even acknowledge is strange.) Instead, he goes to Chelsea’s parents’ swanky dinner party, where he walks in on Daniel and Chelsea having sex in the bathroom, because having sex in your parents’ unlocked bathroom in the middle of their fancy Thanksgiving feast is the sort of thing people do. The talents of the three leading men are wasted on a shallow, misguided story that lets them talk a lot about boners and pooping but gives them no opportunity to be funny or charming.
D+ (1 hr., 34 min.; )
